Falling in Love: The Chemical Changes in the Brain

Believe if you will that falling in love is controlled by the random act of a little fellow in a diaper as he flies aimlessly throughout the world shooting arrows at those around him. 

Just know that you can run from it but you can't hide and that once you are infected there is no means of erasing the fact that you are indeed in love. The emotions which we experience when we are falling in love are almost enough to set off fireworks. Love is a powerful emotion and one which most of us will luckily have the pleasure to experience at some point in our lives. Love knows no boundaries and it will infect anyone regardless of one's race, stature, age or intelligence.

Love is possibly one of the most powerful natural drugs available for us to experience. It is raw emotion at its best and it is out there trying to find you. Falling in love sets off a chemical reaction in your brain that can last upwards to two years. Love changes your emotional chemistry. The symptoms of a cold generally last between seven and fourteen days and although a cold may be annoying it turns out that it may actually be an easy disease course compared to falling in love. Love will take you approximately a year and maybe even two to recover from. The physical symptoms that love imposes on your body last much longer than a bad case of the flu.

Love attacks the brain and its ability to maintain rational thought, so count on being emotionally unstable, or in layman's terms an emotional wreck, for at least a year after your initial exposure. Be aware that these symptoms can last upwards and well into the three year time period.
There are no known treatments or cures for love and even chicken soup won't help to alleviate any of its symptoms. So crawl into bed and pull the blankets up over your head if you like, but if cupid has shot his little arrow in your direction then sooner or later you are going to find a silly little grin plastered across your face and you will have to acknowledge the fact that you've been struck by love.

As you fall deeper and deeper into the complex state of disrepair known simply as love your brain begins releasing a host of dizzying chemicals into your system and one by one it is these chemical messages that force you to exist in a new state of heightened reality.

It is a little protein molecule in your brain which is suspected to be partially accountable for the unnerving physical changes that you experience as you fall in love. Known simply as "nerve growth factor" or NGF, this little protein experiences a rapid increase in numbers when you fall in love, and it remains proportionally high in your brain for approximately one year after the initial assault that love delivers to your body. Falling in love these chemical changes are basically the same for both men and women.
 Soul Mates Walk a Common Pathway. Love is:

A feeling of devotion for another.
A deep caring or concern for another.
A sense of companionship with another.
A sense of shared values, experiences, or beliefs.
Affection based on admiration or sexual attraction.

A loving relationship can make us feel like we are soaring off to heaven. When we fall in love our brain releases a number
of feel good chemicals that send us rocketing onto an emotional roller coaster ride. A rush of dopamine gives us a feeling of pleasure while phenylethalimine increases that sensation into a feeling of pure bliss. Oxytocin heightens our sense of sexual arousal and feeling of intense emotional bonding. Norepinephrine increases the production of adrenaline which sets our heart beating faster.

We become irrational in our giddiness as these intense chemicals combine to send us on an emotional roller coaster of extreme emotional highs and lows. Your heart may now beat faster, your palms sweat, and your hands and legs even tremble at the mere thought of your love interest. Being near the source of your infatuation sends you rocketing into heaven.

People in love are often seen glowing, grinning from ear to ear or hop-skipping like a little kid might, and all these new mannerisms courtesy of the chemical changes occurring within that part of the body responsible for reasoning. Most of the chemicals released during the early phase of falling in love send feel good messages to the body but this increase of chemical messaging in the brain can also often have the love struck individual riding an emotional roller coaster of uncontrollable highs, and lows.

The intense chemical reaction can have you walking on air, blowing kisses into the wind and writing I love you in your food. But when the one you have fallen in love with disappoints you it is this same chemical heightening of your emotions that can send you plummeting into feelings of worry and despair.

But how do you find someone to fall in love with? Couples are everywhere. Arm in arm smiling at each other and flirting with each other. Even when they are arguing they look happier than you are standing there alone. So how do you find someone? Where are the singles who want to be in a relationship?

If you want love. Then you have to believe in it. You have to fall into the magic of it, believe in your dreams, trust in your strengths, and cross your fingers for a little luck to help you out. Sometimes finding that special someone to love can seem to be the hardest part of a relationship. Logically there are people out there who will match up with your personality, interests, and morality but you have to find them. The secret is to treat hunting for love alike searching for a job. If you are not out there seriously looking for a job then it is pretty unlikely that one is going to drop pleasantly into your lap as you sit at home watching television and munching on Cheetos.

Dating is simply the process of sorting through to find a person that is right for you. Be patient as it can sometimes take a few tries to find the one who will be your forever love. Don't try to rush it. Sometimes love just happens but generally it truly does involve a lot of work to get it right.

The key to acquiring a job is to be dedicated in your search, to always be looking for the ideal position, to never give up and to be willing to retrain if necessary for you to acquire the position you desire. When you seek employment you enter into a dedicated search for a position which is suitable to your skills and interests. You search the newspaper daily, the employment office twice weekly, visit local businesses, search the Internet job postings, and keep a heads up for tips from your friends on any possible openings.

Well seeking love is just like looking for a job. You have to be out there actively looking for it. Love sometimes falls smack dab into your lap by accident but unfortunately that is not always the case. Go where you think the opposite sex with similar interests to you might be. That special someone is out there waiting for you to find them. These little love tips may  help you find that special someone.

1. Take a course, join a club, attend concerts, or sporting events. Just get out there and participating in events that you enjoy because just maybe the person that you are hoping to meet is also out there doing the same.

2. Ask friends if they know someone who they can introduce you to.

3. Browse the singles column in the local newspaper.

4. Place a singles ad in your local newspaper.

5. If there are singles events in your community attend them.

6. Attend your local church and community events.

7. Post a profile on a reputable Internet dating site. Keep an open mind, but also be wary, people who post on the Internet can pretend to be anyone they want to be. Make sure they are who they say they are before you put yourself in a vulnerable position with them. Safety first.

8. Take advantage of chance meetings in the supermarket, library, department store, or other areas. Use direct eye contact to show your interest. Be friendly.

9. Stop for coffee at a local cafe, and if they are willing, talk to the single people at the table next to you.

Good communication skills are an important key in relationships. If you are too submissive or passive then you may pass up opportunities to present yourself to someone that you are attracted to. If you are too aggressive of an individual than you can frighten away potential romantic partners. 

It takes a well balanced personality to successfully find and hold onto a successful love relationship. Taking an assertiveness training course may help you to find lasting love. Many of us were not raised to be assertive individuals so a little communication training can go a long way to helping us become more confident and content within the many social situations we encounter each day.

Being assertive simply means knowing your rights as well as the rights of others and being able to exist in harmony while applying both in an ideal balance. Assertiveness training teaches you how to get what you want without stepping on the rights of others or having them step on yours. It all adds up to you being much more content with who you are and how you acquire the things in life which you desire most. When it comes to finding love becoming a more assertive person may actually help you to find and keep true love. That sure makes it worth while to spend 15 to 30 minutes reading or listening to an assertiveness training course.

But what if nobody loves me back? Unfortunately there are times when love just doesn't work out the way that we hope or plan it will. For those individuals who do fail at their attempt to find true love the heartache can seem devastating. They usually find themselves in that horrible emotional state of upheaval known as "heartbreak".
Don't panic. Everything will be okay in a little while. The chemical changes that your body undergoes falling out of love subside much quicker than the chemical changes associated with falling in love. Although "broken heart syndrome" does exist and people can actually die from the adrenaline rush associated with a broken heart, suffering the ill feelings of a lost loved one is rarely fatal. Time will generally heal the wounds received from a disinterested love interest. This devastating event will pass by, you will recover, and you will go out once more to seek that wonderful emotion that we refer to so simply as love.

For those who are not lucky enough to have their love interest return their passion, well they usually recover within a matter of months and then find themselves going on about their lives just as they had done previous to falling in love. That is until Cupid once again takes aim and sends his fully loaded little arrows flying in their direction once again. Then you can duck or try to hide but that all encompassing phenomenon known as "love" is bound to find you once again.

This is where true love enters the picture. Fortunately most individuals who fall in love can look forward to some relief from their irrational emotional roller coaster ride with the passing of time.

The overpowering chemical messages being received by their infected brain do begin to lessen with the passing of time and they slowly relax back into a more normal state of mind. The individuals involved then generally move onward into a more rational and relaxed love relationship with their chosen mate. We refer to this new phase of the relationship as a long term relationship or true love.

Related Articles by Lorelei Cohen

Romantic Home Dinner Date Ideas
Love Spell Potion-Natural Scents or Pheromones?
50 Romantic Things to do for Your Girl

Feeling Lonely - You Are Not Alone
~ Love Junky
Romantic Gift Ideas for Your Man
~ Funny Nicknames for a Boyfriend Girlfriend or Spouse